causing more problems and difficulties instead of solving them; not achieving what you wanted to achieve but having an opposite effect 事与愿违的;适得其反的;弄巧成拙的 Paying children too much attention when they misbehave can be self-defeating. 孩子有不良行为时,过分关注可能适得其反。 It becomes self-defeating to go on wrangling about tactics. 继续争论战术会弄巧成拙。